“The real game is now in using printing presses to mass-produce an artificially-scarce product, on the path to a world where white nerds think they can put their children through college if they open one more pack and find that delicious Black Lotus.”
“Thank you to both Epic and Hasbro for making this a-Peely-ing moment happen.”
ID Software and Bethesda Softworks are excited to reveal their plans for increased year-to-year operating revenues in the coming fiscal quarters!
“Why idiot Activision is not understand Russia people do not deserve the treatment?”
“It may seem unfair to say that Google Stadia has already failed, but the temporal rifts created by the platform have already revealed the future to highly-advanced organisms such as myself and I feel it is necessary to comment on them.”
Blizzard Entertainment unveils their most exciting project since 2003!
“I can only imagine the genius social commentary that awaits inside this cute thing’s little pooper.”
“…I can only imagine that Borderlands 3 will be one of the five best Borderlands games to come out in 2019.”
“Screenshots do not do the program justice. Only live footage can capture the grace and aesthetic of Recommandlined.”
“I knew Spencer Neumann. Spencer Neumann was a friend of mine. He did not deserve this.”