The Game Awards 2014 Sing-Along Guide

“Everything about this show—from the corporate influence, to the structure, and pacing, to the horrible choice of entertainment options—is partially or absolutely the work of one Geoff Keighley, the Lord and Master of Doing the Dew. But talk is cheap and so is this awards ceremony. Let’s get to business.”

E3 2013 Microsoft Press Conference Sing-Along Guide

“If the Xbox One is to succeed as a video game device, it will be achieved by the people who once despised video games as entertainment media or give the artform little to no thought. The destruction of the preservation of art will predictably come from those who value video games the least.”

Cybermania ’94: The Ultimate Gamer Awards Sing-Along Guide

“And with the wild success of the PlayStation and the calamitous failure of “multimedia”, the legend of Cybermania ’94: The Ultimate Gamer Awards only grows greater, with the cars at the back of the train finally reaching the crash in front of them.”

Spike 2010 Video Game Awards Sing-Along Guide

“This “event” is about “honoring” as many video games as possible and then promoting the sequel; where Uncharted 2 can win Game of the Year while losing out on Best Action-Adventure Game.”