Modern Warfare Prove Once Again Videogame Cannot Depict the Russia

This article by Russia Hackteam has been edited for grammar.

Why idiot Activision is not understand Russia people do not deserve the treatment?

We are to say first that Russia Hackteam is not mad at storyline where it is clear Russia is once again the bad enemy in new Call of Duty game. Some Russia very angry at this, claim is unfunny outdated stereotype. “Ha ha, I am Russia, talk with the funny accent, drive horse instead of car.” What the ever. I explain many time to American idiot, we are not that different from each other, but this issue has been the forever, and is not REAL issue.

Problem is that once I am finish play amazing five-minute single player campaign, I join fellow member of Russia Hackteam at Nikolai Bulganin Internet Cafe on Mikhail Gorbachev Avenue in heart of Moscow, Russia. We are prepare for online battle against best player in world and deadliest computer virus. Russia Hackteam attach many inches of bullet-proof armor to computer and prepare for worst. But upon loading of match on Shoot House, message appear: “You have been ban for hack!”

What hell is this? Why continue to happen with idiot at Infinity Ward and Treyarch and Activision-Blizzard? Nearly decade ago, Russia Hackteam come to America and fire weapon into windows of Activision-Blizzard headquarter, scream many time that HACK IS VERY IMPORTANT TO RUSSIA CULTURE. And yet, nothing is the change. Russia deserve fair and the honest representation!

Remember that many thing have change since Russia Hackteam become first Call of Duty player to use hack. It was only few year ago that hacker win significant civil right victory, make Donald Trump first American President to win by hack the election. But now is the year 2019 and once again the videogame STILL treat hacker like second-class citizen!

Where is Russian who use AK-47 with aimhack and wallhack attachment? Where are the good guy?

Russia Supreme Court settle this many year ago in landmark case Hack v. Cheat. Second-in-command at Russia Hackteam is Yuri Yablonski, he claim to be lawyer, provide long-standing argument of Russia Hackteam: “Is monitor cheat? Monitor make game easier to play but is not cheat. Therefore, hack is not cheat.” Enemy lawyer has no idea what to say.  Court is unanimous decision and Russia Hackteam is national hero.

But in America, ask typical American, maybe four-out-of-ten know who is Russia Hackteam, and most Call of Duty player ban Russia Hackteam on sight. American media is highly the responsible, hate everything Russia do. First time, America history book refuse to give us credit for defeat Japanese at Pearl Harbor. Then second, Olympics claim Soviet athlete use “steroids” and “world record does not count”. Then finally, America make videogame and they say “Hack is cheat!”

You must understand, it is three decade since Soviet Union create Tetris (the first videogame) but to this very today, only two videogame which understand hack is not cheat. First is Counter-Strike. This is game that remind me of human being who have all kind of harmful bacteria in gut, but bacteria fight each other instead of kill human. Game is warfare and testing ground for all kind of cheat program and computer virus.

There is reason that Counter-Strike is still popular game, which is that in current year, most videogame company hook up game to internet, and if player is using hack, company will issue “patch” and they will make sure hack does not work. But Counter-Strike use outdated technology, literally impossible to ban hack, so player experiment, use most powerful cheat programs.

Sometime, cheat program is so powerful that only option is to use real-life weapon, Russia Hackteam fondly remember matches against idiot monkeys from down the street, The Sasha Killers, lead by braindead penis Sasha Sashovich. Sasha Killers come very close to winning match against Russia Hackteam, that is when Mikahil shout “KNIFE ROUND!” and all hell break loose inside of computer area.

Sometime, explosive inside of game are not good enough. You must use explosive outside of game.

Russia Hackteam suffer many injury on that day but cause significantly more injury on way to winning important match in computer videogame, become long-lasting memory at Nikolai Bulganin Internet Cafe because blood is difficult get out of wall. This was great day for Russia Hackteam, and there is reason Counter-Strike most popular videogame in Russia up until release of second game, which is Facebook.

Facebook is release in year 2016, is the revolutionary videogame where goal is get as many people angry as possible at Hillary Clinton. Where is illegal email server? Why is she steal the nomination from Bernie Sanders? Russia Hackteam is not best in world at this game but still very much enjoy it, is staggering number of way to trick American into voting for stupid monkeys.

But Mark Zuckerberg is great videogame designer, does not say, “Fake picture and fake news is cheat!” No, he say, “We want MORE fake picture and fake news!” Enemy of Facebook say this because of money, but Mark is only concern with what make Facebook the best videogame. This lead to exciting metagame, billions of fake users, and even third-party company steal personal information of real user!

So now Facebook create world most popular videogame, billions of player, and is make more money than all other videogame company. Facebook is fill with hack and cheat and fake news and many Russian enjoy this great game! There is even knockoff videogame call Twitter that is kind of good. But in “real” videogame industry, even after years of Facebook, hack is still “cheat” and “illegal”!

In America, there is saying, that more things change, more is stay of same. Also in America, there is saying, can you super-size this? Point I am making is that America is stupid, filled with idiot, country claim you must “play fair” and “do not break law”, but people at top of capitalist system break every rule to steal money from little orphan children.

There is theory I have: If Modern Warfare allow American to use hack, then they will use hack in real-life, hack rich people into tiny bits and finally bring communism to United States. So American President go to Activision, say that, “Yes, we know hack make game more fun, is not cheat, but American people cannot know this!”

Hack will spread to all part of city in all continent on Earth and the revolution will begin!

And thus is reason that when Yuri use machine gun that fire Stuxnet Virus, or get killstreak that hack real-life Russian drone, which fire real-life Russian missile into idiot at Boris Yeltsin Internet Cafe in Minsk, that American say is “unfair” and “violate Terms of Use”. America know they cannot compete with Russia, America know they cannot win.

So Modern Warfare once again do not care about best interests of Russian gamer, maybe they will get it right in next game, perhaps every copy of Call of Duty will come with infected USB stick, maybe Russia will use virus to cripple worldwide critical infrastructure as part of exciting social media campaign. But this is the unlikely. America never on our side and we know this.

Russia Hackteam will hold head of high, continue to fight for gamer of all race and religion, so long as use hack, and understand hack is not cheat.

Russia #1.