Hellblade is Other People

Hellblade is Other People

Michael LowellSep 11, 20220
“Nobody has provided me with a good reason that I should be playing Hellblade: Senua’s Sacrifice when it is significantly more satisfying to COMPLAIN about it.”
The Bemani Pro League Is AAAwkward

The Bemani Pro League Is AAAwkward

Michael LowellAug 31, 20220
“And in this moment, we can declare that the Bemani Pro League is a resounding success, a love letter and celebration of a genre that no one plays anymore and that would not have been cutting-edge if it had been released in the nineteenth century, produced by a company that hasn’t cared about the videogame business in over a decade.”
The Fortnite Secret Lair is the Best Fortnite Secret Lair Yet

The Fortnite Secret Lair is the Best Fortnite Secret Lair Yet

Michael LowellAug 25, 20220
“Thank you to both Epic and Hasbro for making this a-Peely-ing moment happen.”
A Message From Doom Eternal

A Message From Doom Eternal

ID Software and Bethesda Softworks are excited to reveal their plans for increased year-to-year operating revenues in the coming fiscal quarters!
DmC: DMC is Okay

DmC: DMC is Okay

Michael LowellApr 10, 20202
We explore this sexual deviant and terrorist’s SSSensational adventures.
Modern Warfare Prove Once Again Videogame Cannot Depict the Russia

Modern Warfare Prove Once Again Videogame Cannot Depict the Russia

“Why idiot Activision is not understand Russia people do not deserve the treatment?”
Why Google Stadia Failed

Why Google Stadia Failed

Michael LowellNov 24, 20190
“It may seem unfair to say that Google Stadia has already failed, but the temporal rifts created by the platform have already revealed the future to highly-advanced organisms such as myself and I feel it is necessary to comment on them.”
Toxic Behavior – From Anonymous to Furious

Toxic Behavior – From Anonymous to Furious

Michael LowellOct 20, 20190
“It’s more that nobody has “designed” anything, really, that the internet is a ramshackle bumfuck of a disaster designed by socially-awkward code monkeys who will be the first to go when we start murdering all of the robots.”
Toxic Behavior – A Primer on Human Nature

Toxic Behavior – A Primer on Human Nature

Michael LowellAug 11, 20190
“…in order to understand why they are dumb, so that we can understand what ails our cutting-edge videogames, we need a primer on what I imagine actual researchers with actual degrees have to say about evolution and psychology.”
Toxic Behavior – Introduction

Toxic Behavior – Introduction

Michael LowellAug 3, 20190
…a series of essays on how modern videogames turned humans into panicky animals.
Warcraft III is in Early Access

Warcraft III is in Early Access

Michael LowellMay 31, 20190
Blizzard Entertainment unveils their most exciting project since 2003!
The Sonic the Hedgehog Trailer Transcends Humanity

The Sonic the Hedgehog Trailer Transcends Humanity

Michael LowellMay 3, 20190
“I can only imagine the genius social commentary that awaits inside this cute thing’s little pooper.”
Borderlands 3 – First Impressions

Borderlands 3 – First Impressions

Michael LowellMar 30, 20190
“…I can only imagine that Borderlands 3 will be one of the five best Borderlands games to come out in 2019.”
MS-DOS: Recommandlined Preview

MS-DOS: Recommandlined Preview

Michael LowellJan 5, 20190
“Screenshots do not do the program justice. Only live footage can capture the grace and aesthetic of Recommandlined.”
A Tribute to Spencer Neumann

A Tribute to Spencer Neumann

Michael LowellJan 2, 20190
“I knew Spencer Neumann. Spencer Neumann was a friend of mine. He did not deserve this.”
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